Circassian wedding festivals
The
Circassian people originate from the region of Circassia along the North
Caucasus and along the northeast shore of the Black Sea. In Circassian society
interaction between the sexes is allowed under the proper supervision. Unlike
many societies marriage is not arranged by the parents, instead a young male
suitor called pselhix’w, or soul-searcher is allowed to visit the house of a
young woman he is interested in to get to know her better. After the suitor
finds a suitable companion whom shares the same mutual feeling of love, they
send a trusted delegate, usually a respected elder to meet the father and ask
him for his daughter’s hand on behalf of the suitor. Marriage festivities
are considered very intricate
and enjoyable social events by Circassian society. Traditional Circassian
Wedding’s are made up of a variety of ceremonies which would be held at three
places; the house of the bride’s father, the house of the bridegroom’s father,
and at the house where the bridegroom is lodged until the wedding night. The
first ceremony is held at grooms fathers house, where a traditional ceremonial
toast is given.
The next ceremony called the Nisashe is a feast in honor of the guests at the house of the bride’s parents before they convey her to
her new home. Many traditional songs are sung by the guests, the most common of
which is the ‘Nisashe song’ known as
‘Wereide, bestow happiness on our bride!’ It is also not uncommon for an azheghafe (clown) dressed in the skin of a billy-goat
to participate in the ceremonies to infuse some humor into the event.
When the wedding procession arrives at
the gate of the house of the bridegroom’s father, songs are sung signaling her
arrival to her new home. Once inside the yard, the ceremony of ‘removing the
veil’ is then conducted. One of the masters of ceremonies would take out his
dagger and with its tip lifted the veil or screen of the bride’s head-cover.
The head-cover however (as opposed to the veil) is not taken off until after
the ceremony by a confidant of the bride’s father. After this the master of
ceremony addresses the elder females of the bridegroom’s father’s household and
asks them to join him in a song-like toast blessing their new daughter-in-law.
This is followed by the ceremony of
‘Wineyishe’ also at the grooms
fathers house, where the new bride is to be formally introduced to her
mother-in-law and other female elders.
Since the groom is prohibited from
attending these ceremonies he resides at a friend or relative’s house where
with a group of friends several minor traditional songs are sung in his honor,
all in isolation of the main wedding ceremonies. He remains here until the ‘Schaweyishezh’, which is when he must devise
a method to sneak into his bride’s room unnoticed as she stays at his father’s
house and finally consummate the marriage. This is because in Circassian
society it was considered inappropriate to be seen entering the bedroom of ones
new bride.
Marriage in Hindu Culture
In
India, Marriage is arguably considered the most important social and religious
event in a person’s life. This is because in Hinduism marriage marks the
transition into the second stage of ones life cycle known as garhastya, the Householder stage. In
Hindu society marriage is considered so important that the decision is rarely
left to the individuals actually involved. Having one’s parents arrange a
marriage is very common and to many is considered the norm.
The traditional Hindu
wedding ceremony is usually performed in a sequence of different events
starting with the Baraat or Swagat which is the
arrival of the groom accompanied by his family and friends who singing and
dance as they make their way to the wedding hall or temple. The Swagatam, which is the welcoming the
Groom and his family and friends, follows this. The groom is treated to a
welcome ritual at the entrance by the bride’s mother and is then escorted to
the mandap which is a temporary
structure built for the wedding that consists of four pillars. Before the groom
enters the mandap he is instructed by
a priest to remove his shoes, it is not uncommon during many ceremonies for the
Bride’s family to try and steal the shoes (for fun) while the Groom’s
family protects them. By the end of the wedding, if the shoes are stolen,
the Groom must offer the new family money or gifts to retrieve them.
The
bride is then escorted to the mandap by
her maternal uncles. The bride’s father then gives his daughter to the
groom in marriage, witnessed by the fire God. The giving of the bride is
called the Kanya Daan and is
considered the highest form of gift that parents can offer. The ends of
Bride and Groom’s garments are tied together with betel nuts, copper coins and
rice symbolizing unity and eternal bond of marriage. The priest then
kindles the fire and the couple makes nine offerings to the fire to ask for
removal of darkness and any ignorance. The couple then perform the Mangal
Fera which is when they walk
around the fire four times which signify the last fours stages of life; Dharma
(Righteousness), Artha (Monetary accomplishment), Karma (Energy and passion for
life), and Moksha (liberation from everything in life).
The groom offers the bride, life long protection by
giving her the Mangalsutra, a sacred
necklace made with black beads with gold, then placing a red powder known
as sindhoor on the crown of her
forehead. The couple then feed each other traditional sweets before reciting
the Saptapadi, which is a set of 7
vows. After this the priest and members of their families bless the newly wed
couple. The final ceremony or the Vidai is when the brides family wishes
her the best and bid her farewell as she leaves her parent’s home to begin a
new life with her husband. Sometimes the bride’s family most commonly her
sister(s) try to stop the car from leaving by placing their hands on the bonnet
so that their new brother-in-law asks their permission to take the bride away
with him, and offers gifts as a token. Before the wedding car departs, the
priest places a coconut under the front wheel and waits for it to be broken
under the weight of the car. This is to ensure a safe journey and to
bless the start of their newly married life.
Both
Hindu and Circassian society view marriage as a key point in an individuals
life, as it marks a major transition in ones lifestyle and role in society.
This is probably why in both cultures weddings are considered large joyous
social events that require a lot of preparation and participation from several
members of both families. The active role the parent’s play in the ceremonies
depicts the level importance and respect that both societies place on the
influence of ones family. This is especially evident with the bride’s parents,
whom hold a significant amount of authority, and in the end make the final
decision regarding their daughter’s future. However in Circassian culture the
process of finding a spouse is left up to the individuals actually getting
married not their parents unlike Hindu culture, which relies heavily on
matchmaking through ones parents. Although Hindu weddings are far more
concentrated in terms of ceremonial locations, both cultures have unique
customs and traditions that take place before and after the main ceremony that
hold symbolic value.
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